Author: Omnibus

In which we celebrate 167 years of Americans being able to claim any island they like as long as it has enough bird poop on it, and John thinks you can dip a pole in liberty. Certificate #39867.

In which a remote part of Idaho solves its beaver dam problem with some surplus parachutes and an even more remote part of Idaho, and Ken applies the transitive property to mules and culverts. Certificate #31297.

In which German health nuts give the world the idea of social nude recreation before the Nazis can tell them not to, and John thinks of something that is better than itching. Certificate #53668.

In which the ponds of New England become the wellspring of a new worldwide web of perishable foods, and Ken learns that gum is a forest treat. Certificate #23725.

In which the estate of the century's greatest scientist becomes a $200 million enterprise even as his brain tissue languishes in a cider box, and John compares it to pastrami. Certificate #21917.

In which a ski bum with dad jokes explores new frontiers of film distribution and extreme sports, and Ken is a water machine. Certificate #48941.

In which the rift between two Communist dictators leads to a blooming of mariachi culture in the fertile soil of the Balkans, and John is baffled by Vietnamese karaoke. Certificate #46465.

In which the smartest people in the world bloom early but often struggle to live up that promise later in life, and Ken's phone thinks he lives at the zoo. Certificate #50285.

In which tensions over slavery and its westward expansion boil over into an assault on the floor of the United States Senate, and Ken does not have a single cloak. Certificate #46116.